Comedic Misgivings

April 15th and The Emotional Audit

I dreamed of a distant future last night.  It wasn’t a post-apocalyptic wasteland with acidified oceans and vomit colored sunsets, and the surviving population wasn’t dodging a race of zombified […]

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Bother… It’s Easy!

It’s a hackneyed gripe, and the last thing I want is to sound embittered, but I swear to god, I’ll shoot up a CVS the next time I get an […]

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The Benefits of F%#&ing Off

“I think that there is far too much work done in the world, that immense harm is caused by the belief that work is virtuous, and that what needs to […]

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Airport Insecurity

It takes all the self-restraint one can muster at the airport, when asked with a straight face at check-in “if you are carrying any hazardous materials or if anyone has […]

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Extremophiles: Noxious & Loving It

There was a highly compelling rumor orbiting the biosphere at the beginning of December that NASA had finally discovered verifiable alien life. It was not clear in aggregators like The […]

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Scoring Ain’t Easy

Occasionally on this whirling carousel called life, things just seem to click: the deal closes, the plants flower, the opposite sex finds us irresistible and throws themselves at us without […]

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The Iceman Bummeth

Of all the positions in all the wide world of sports, one stands alone with the dubious distinction of being the loneliest: that of the ice hockey goalie. All goalies […]

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The Unfortunately Fortunate

One of the most serious dangers in economic downturns such as these is turning a blind-eye to the neediest of cases. As usual, the hardest hit group of all has […]

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Post Modern Woman

As a post modern woman in new millennia America, I often find myself wishing, willing even, that there were more than twenty-three point four hours in a day.  Time is […]

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Philosophical Foreplay

The woman in my bed was such a dollface.  So unlike the women I had been with before.  She had a subtle beauty, one that would look good in extreme […]

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Wanderlust

What’s most essential about cities like Manhattan, Paris and London are not their endlessly variegated tiers of high and low culture, their multitudes of peopledom, or their architectural majesty.  Those […]

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The Whole Wide World

It was far too many bits for any one brain to process.  It was the entire information age exploded inward, swirling like some three dimensional Rorschach lava lamp broken open […]

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Easy Tiger

Maybe you can be of some help here.  I have a wonderful, handsome, on-his-way-to-wealthy single friend I’d love to set up with a cute, smart, deserving young woman who wants […]

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Stream of Consciousness

From Unequalibrium, inspired by my toubab, Luke Q.   If you’re finding yourself depressed, but not clinically, locked in a myopic worldview, or simply unappreciative of the fact that you’re […]

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When I Was Your Age

Are you ready for bed yet, kitty cat?  It’s getting late, so be a good girl and climb into your jelly pod.  Grandpa wants to talk to you about something… […]

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